Tuesday, January 17, 2012
Happy 70th Birthday Muhammad Ali
Rnd 1 - I done wrestled with an alligator, I done tussled with a whale, only last week I murdered a rock, injured a stone, hospitalized a brick. I'm so mean I make medicine sick.
Rnd 2 - There's not a man alive who can whup me. I'm too fast. I'm too smart. I'm too pretty. I should be a postage stamp. That's the only way I'll ever get licked.
Rnd 3 - I'm so fast that last night I turned off the light switch in my hotel room and was in bed before the room was dark.
Rnd 4 - I am the astronaut of boxing. Joe Louis and Dempsey were just jet pilots. I'm in a world of my own.
Rnd 5 - If you dream of beating me, you'd better wake up and apologise.
Rnd 6 - There are two things that are hard to hit and see. That's a spooky ghost and Muhammad Ali.
Rnd 7 - One of these days, they're liable to make the house I grew up in a national shrine.
ON JOE FRAZIER
Rnd 8 - Frazier is so ugly he should donate his face to the US Bureau of Wildlife.
Rnd 9 - Frazier is so ugly that when he cries, the tears turn around and go down the back of his head.
ON GEORGE FOREMAN
Rnd 10 - I've seen George Foreman shadow boxing. And the shadow won.
Rnd 11 - It's a divine fight. This Foreman - he represents Christianity, America, the flag. I can't let him win. He represents pork chops.
ON FLOYD PATTERSON
Rnd 12 - I'll beat him so bad, he'll need a shoehorn to put his hat on.
ON SONNY LISTON
Rnd 13 - Sonny Liston is nothing. The man can't talk. The man can't fight. The man needs talking lessons. The man needs boxing lessons. And since he's gonna fight me, he needs falling lessons.
ON HOWARD COSSELL
Rnd 14 - You're always talking about, Muhammad, you're not the same man you were 10 years ago. Well, I asked your wife, and she told me you're not the same man you was two years ago!
Rnd 15 - I'm the best. I just haven't played yet.